Soaking It All In

The last week has been a wonderful whirlwind; a collision of laughter, tears, disbelief, and a little uncertainty at what to feel.  We have gotten to visit and pray for patients that are sick and, for some, on the brink of death, play with and love on the cutest little kids ever, and spend some much-needed time in community, both with our American and German team members and with our African brothers and sisters.  There have been so many things over the past week  that have tugged on my heart, but one of the most pivotal moments was visiting the children’s jail.  Even just saying, “children’s jail”, makes me cringe and everything about it just made me want to cry out, “these little ones, many completely innocent, are worth so much more than these walls are ever going to communicate to them.”  From the second we turned onto the dirt road towards the jail, it was evident there was a darkness about this place.  Even the road to the jail was different than any other road, which is saying a lot.  The majority of roads (if you can even call them that) in this area are far from anything that would be even remotely acceptable in the U.S., but this road… this road had trash everywhere and screamed of the forgotten and disregarded.  As we pulled into the jail, we saw children in uniforms, many torn and tattered, but even these children, dejected from their families and society, greeted us with beautifully warm smiles and high fives.   Even though our time with them was short, there were already a few that had stolen my heart.  And, as I looked around, I started to get discouraged at how many cases needed to be heard, how many children needed to be reminded that they are so special, fearfully and wonderfully made by the Creator of the heavens and earth.  But, I have been reminded that He does not call us to take on the world, He calls us to love those that He has put in front of us, one at a time.  And so, as He continues to show me what true faith looks like, I will continue to walk forward in this charge, even when I have no idea whether it’s making any difference at all.  And I will take comfort in knowing that He knows.  After all, it’s His plan anyways. 

I also have to mention another major praise report to this story.  Our team leader, Dave, said that the conditions in the jail are already so much better than what he experienced 2 years ago.  Westerners have been coming and, out of broken hearts, they have taken action at some of the conditions.  The jail now has cement floors, rather than dirt, and the walls have been painted, so it now looks more like a school, rather than a prison!  Please continue to pray for these sweet little ones, that their families would desire to bring them home and would be willing to fight to see that happen, if necessary.  And, in the mean time, that there would continue to be people that want to come into this darkness and shine light into it, one step at a time.

On a very different note, we just arrived home from a one-night getaway at a quaint little place in an incredibly beautiful rainforest a couple hours outside of Kisumu.  When we first arrived yesterday morning, I have to admit that I was uncomfortable with all of the quietness and serenity, especially coming out of the busyness of the last week in Kenya and the couple months leading up to the trip. But the Lord always knows just what we need and, often times, has to remind me that my wants and desires are not always in my best interest.  Of course, I know this in theory, but it’s sure amazing how often I have to be reminded!  Over the course of the next few hours, He began to quiet my heart before Him and continued to whisper over and over again, “Be still and know that I am God”.   Oh how much I wanted to fight against that at first, but how much I needed to hear it.

One of the things that this resort offered, was a walk through the rainforest and then hiking to the top of the highest mountain in the region to watch the sunset.   I have always been a sucker for a sunset, so I thought “sure, why not”.   Looking back now, my flippancy at what I was about to behold must have been comical to God.  The rainforest walk was beautiful and so awe-inspiring to see the thousands of different plants, insects, and animals that He had created in such a small place.  But this was just the opening act!  From there, we began hiking the mountain that we would be watching the sunset from.   As we were reaching the top of the hill, we came to a landing where we could stop and catch our breath and, as I turned around, I just as quickly lost it again at the magnificence that was before us.  Now, most of you know that I am a crier by nature, but few things have so instantly captured my heart and overwhelmed my soul in a way that my only response was to cry.  If I could try to paint a visual, it reminded me of the movie “The Lion King”, when Simba’s dad bring him out onto the ledge of the rock to view their entire kingdom and the music comes to a crescendo, leaving you in awe and disbelief (okay, maybe you didn’t feel that in The Lion King, but even the hardest of hearts couldn’t help but feel that at this sight!).  And from there, we went a little higher and watched the most glorious sunset I had ever seen.  As I sat there watching, I couldn’t help but wonder how people could not believe in a God; how someone could see something so magnificent and think that it could just be a coincidence.  And, for those of us that believe, we get to take in the overwhelming beauty of sunsets such as these, and know that it’s only a microscopic reflection of the complete beauty and greatness that we will get to experience in heaven one day.  We wanted to be able to share it with all of you (our favorites :) so we all tried to take pictures, but could not even remotely do it justice.  But we did talk about how comforting it was to know that, half way across the world, this same sun was shining its morning light on all of you.

 For all of the fear and nervousness leading up this trip, it has gone by so fast and I can now see that I am going to have to tear myself away from this place I have already come to hold so dear.  I will try to write one more time before we leave on Saturday.  Thank you again so much for your continued prayers and support. I love you guys!